Monday, March 18, 2013

A New Start... and a Plan

Beginning of June 2012


Believe it or not, finding a doctor was an easy task. When my sister in law had her baby, I was amazed at how her doctor treated her as not only as a patient but as a caring friend, offering "suggestions" to her instead of telling her how she thought everything should go. She had urged me to go to this doctor before but I didn't want to change at that time. Now? I was ready... I was MORE than ready. I never wanted to step foot back in my regular doctor's office again! And I haven't! (well except to pick up my medical records)

So, I called her doctor... got the nicest receptionist I have ever spoken to on the phone... "I would like to make an appointment with Dr. So and So please."... "Oh, Absolutely! Have you seen her before?" "No, ma'am." "Okay well it might be a couple of weeks before we can get you in as a new patient, is that okay with you sweetie?" "Yes!" if I had anything it was time right? I got an appointment just in time to start medication for my next cycle, if that's what she wanted to do.

In the meantime, I went on a trip. A much needed trip with my mother to the beach. A few days in the sand and sun and outlet malls. I thought of our baby so much on that trip, I spent a lot of time deep in thought, scared of what was to come, going over and over what had brought us here in the first place... but by the end of it I was really missing my husband and ready to start our "infertility journey"

 
 

My first appointment at the new office had finally arrived. I was ready. Scared but ready. I waited all of about 10 minutes before I was taken back to a room. Already an improvement from the hour and a half long waits at the previous office. Once they did my vitals, I waited for the doctor, who was in the room before I knew it. She introduced herself then asked me a few questions... then suddenly she stopped and looked at me and said "you look so familiar, have we met?" Wow yeah once. "We met when you delivered my nephew, 'the mom' is my sister in law." "Yes! I knew I recognized you!" Even more progress. Talking to her was like talking to a friend I had known forever. There was no intimidation, there was no talking down to me, there was only her talking me like I was a person that she cared about!! Talk about PROGRESS!! We went over everything that had been done so far. What my labs were, what they should be, what isn't working. The she asked how I wanted to go about this.

She gave me a list of options:
  • We could keep trying naturally for a while.
  • We could try clomid.
  • We could try naturally and then add progesterone later.
  • We could try clomid and progesterone supplements together.
Then she gave me her recommendation... first she asked how badly we were ready to get pregnant? I had told her about her first pregnancy and all my feelings, etc. I told her we were ready to be parents yesterday. She giggled and then said, "okay then. If we are going to do this, I think we should give it all we've got! Here's what I think we should do to give you your best shot..." So there was a plan. I would take clomid on days 5-9 of my cycle. We would start taking ovulation tests on day 9 until I got a positive one and then a negative one. We would start progesterone supplements 3 days after a positive ovulation test and continue them until I either started my period or through the first trimester if we were to be pregnant. She also recommended that we continue charting using the basal body temperature thermometer. She also wanted me to have a sonohysterogram (an ultrasound guided test where your uterus is filled with saline and the interior of the uterus- the endometrial cavity- is evaluated). I left feeling confident... confident about our plan and confident that she REALLY wanted to help us. Just the fact that she cared brought me so much comfort. I was so grateful that she had come into our lives! I remember thinking on the way home... "Okay God, I'm ready... let's do this!" I'm always comforted when there is a plan of action, a direction to head that I can focus on.

I was not prepared for how my body would react to that first round of medication...
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If you are starting your infertility journey, the first thing I would ask you is... How do you feel about your doctor? If you have a good relationship, fantastic! If you are iffy... LOOK AROUND! So many doctors these days treat you like just another patient. This is a journey where you need your doctor to be an advocate for you! If you feel like you aren't being treated as well as you should... then that very well might be the case. I know it can be hard making a transition to a different doctor, especially if you have been going to the same one forever. Find someone who has been in your situation, ask them about their doctor, the tests they've done etc... Do research on what should or should not be done in your situation, ask questions... LOTS of questions. Write them down so you don't forget them. Don't be afraid to asks for tests to be done. BE YOUR OWN ADVOCATE TOO.

Second... This process is overwhelming! You are going to need a 'sister' to lean on through this that completely understands what you are going through. Find a support group or someone you can call, text or e-mail when you have questions or thoughts or just need to vent! I understand no one wants to be a member of the 'sisterhood' of women who have lost babies and/or are infertile, but I can tell you that you won't find a better friend than someone who has walked in your shoes. If you are in need of a support group I can recommend one to you. If you need a friend... I'll be your friend. I am here to answer anything you want. thejewells319@gmail.com

You always think the only thing you need to get pregnant is a man... but in our case, we need a doctor too... and a WHOLE lot of faith... and a WHOLE lot of support!!

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