Half Baked!

Hello friends!

Lots of people have been asking how we are doing lately... I must apologize that we haven't updated you all sooner.

It's been an exciting time in the Jewell household. We got to celebrate Mother's Day by witnessing the wedding of my beautiful sister in law. That was a nice little getaway to Virginia. We had a blast with the family and we truly couldn't have found anyone better for her to marry. We can see so many fun adventures in their future. There's nothing more beautiful than witnessing such love.

Otherwise, we have spent every minute of our free time working on our house. We finally got our hardwood floors installed and now have the wonderful job of cleaning and putting the house back together, one room down... all of the rest to go.

The hardwood is turning out beautifully. Hubby has done an amazing job. I've helped as much as I can... although I felt like I should have been doing more, we both still try to be super careful, given our past pregnancy history.

I have managed a few fun projects for our little man in between home improvement sessions, including revamping a baby bouncer and customizing a onesie :) I can't wait to get started on the big projects like working on his room!

For the most part, things have gone really well, minus one bad week that included a stomach virus and a hospital stay... but Caleb is STRONG! I'm happy to say he is doing wonderful.

He and I have both had quite a bit of growth in the last few weeks! I'm also happy to say we have passed the halfway mark! Today we are 20 weeks and 5 days.

The last picture here is from today's appointment, as you can see... we have one stubborn little man. He refused to turn over to give us a good picture so he owes me some cooperation so we can get a good 3D shot at our next visit!

As for me... well... I've had a growth spurt.

Caleb is definitely his father's son, all I want lately is sweets... chocolate... ice cream... oreos... so not me! We finally found some equal ground with sweet apples, that's more my style. As long as he is growing and I can stay healthy for him, I give in to the cravings quite a bit.

I began feeling movements very early, it was exciting... now the kicks are to the point where you can see my stomach jump when he kicks really hard. He finally kicked hard enough for Daddy to feel, it's amazing. Every feeling is amazing. Every day is surreal.

Our checkup today was great! He is weighing in at 15oz (almost a pound already!!). We only saw two minor things that will be watched in the future. Caleb has a little bit of a fluid collection in one of his kidneys, not enough to be concerned... not enough to even be considered hydronephrosis or to think there is any sort of blockage in his urinary tract, just enough to be noticeable. Mommy has a low lying placenta, which means it's a little close to my cervix. Again not enough to be concerned, just to be watched. It's likely that neither of these will be an issue. I'm not concerned in the least. We've come so far...

Some days, I still can't believe we have made it this far. I cannot wait until the day we get to hold this child in our arms... look into his eyes... feel his skin... hear his cries. That's the dream. A dream that is closer to becoming a reality every day. I believe in this miracle. Not one day goes by that I don't thank God for every second, every movement, every beautiful day.

Sure, I have the normal pregnancy aches and pains, but I truly can't complain. We've gone through hell to get here and I refuse to take a second of it for granted. I tell him all the time I love him... I sing to him... there's a few particular songs I think he prefers, the ones he always kicks to. I feel like we have our own little language to each other. Feeling subtle movements feels like my own little secret when I'm doing other things, little reminders that he's there... growing... thriving.

Thank you all for your continued prayers. I feel so blessed to be able to share this with you.

A few people have questioned why I don't update on Facebook very much. I do on occasion, but I don't post many ultrasounds or bump pictures and there is a reason for this. I have befriended so many women who are still struggling, I remember the ache of seeing such things ALL OF THE TIME. So although I do post things on occasion, I definitely don't share them weekly unless I'm asked. I know what they would give to be in our shoes, and it is one little thing I can do to protect them from hurt... to help just a little... to still stand with them and for them. To show them even in our joy, I stand by their side in their pain. They are never alone. I know they are happy for us, and they celebrate the milestones when we do post, I just feel called to keep being their support.

Please keep your prayers coming! 135 days to go! Come on October!

All glory and praise to our amazing Lord!! I cannot give enough thanks and praise for everything He has done in our life!

Hello Second Trimester!

Hello and happy Good Friday everyone!! As we celebrate this weekend and all that God has done for us, we are most thankful that on this Good Friday, He sacrificed himself, so that we all may be washed clean in His blood... paying for our sins. What a beautiful gift. I hope you are all feeling the love of Christ this Easter season!

Today, we are 14 weeks pregnant, in our second trimester and feeling amazing! No more morning sickness, a little more energy... and feeling overwhelmed with love for our sweet clover baby. We are growing!!

We checked on our little baby this week... and little clover decided to give us quite a little show... showing off all of his growth and his smooth moves... and even... his family jewels! Yes, ladies and gentlemen... our little clover baby is a boy! We are having a son!

Making that statement brings me to tears as I am writing this. Our sweet son. Our beautiful miracle. The one we cried over... struggled for... prayed for... begged for... and are now thanking God every second for.

After a rough weekend last week, me with bronchitis following a bad sinus infection... and hubby also sick, we have some catching up to do around this house! The biggest task at hand: working on our new floors... we have roughly 5 months to get everything in order for our sweet baby boy!! Oh and I'm sure you are all wondering, we HAVE chosen a name. :)

Please continue to pray for our rainbow baby! (A rainbow baby is a baby that comes after the "storm", a loss or several losses or infertility... or in our case, all of the above. It's a symbol of God fulfilling His promises and His undying love for his children.) We receive this last weekend as our first gift for our sweet clover baby!

My mind is racing a thousand miles a minute with ideas for rooms and wishes and dream for our sweet Caleb...  my heart is overflowing! Thank you everyone for standing in prayer and love with us as we continue this amazing journey! I can hardly put my thoughts in order as I'm writing this.

If you find yourself in the middle of a stormy time, remember, God will NEVER leave your side. Trust Him, walk WITH Him... depend on HIM! You will find your rainbow!

12 Weeks!

Hello dear friends,

We have arrived at 12 weeks. It still feels so strange, like a dream come true. This week we saw a regular doctor. That felt so bizarre... to be back in that office, with the "normal" people. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared to leave our specialist. Even though he repeatedly told us that everything was perfect and normal, it still feels surreal to have a "normal" pregnancy progressing so beautifully. I never dreamed this would be our situation, I desperately wanted a miracle, but is anyone really prepared for it? We dream of it... we beg for it... but do we truly believe it will happen to us? I can't say that I did.

I spend much of my days in prayer, as I've probably said before. Prayers of devotion, thanksgiving, protection and peace. And guess what? God always answers my prayers, I pray for peace and I receive it. Whenever I become anxious, I repeat in my mind "I believe in this miracle. Thank you Lord for bestowing this amazing blessing upon us." I say it until I'm confident in it. And I do. I believe in this miracle. I believe in your miracle too, even if you haven't received it yet. God is still good. God is good all of the time.

I sought the Lord and He answered me. He delivered me from all of my fears. Psalm 43:4

 

Our most recent appointment couldn't have gone better. Clover baby is growing, moving and beautiful.

 

 

Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him and He will help you. Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act. Psalm 37:5,7

 

I am so in love with this child. I'm in love with all of my children, and I long for the day when we are all together in Heaven... but for now I rest in this feeling of joy. We don't see a doctor again for an ENTIRE month! I've never been allowed to go that long, it's scary and so exciting. I cannot wait to find out whether our little clover baby is a boy or a girl. I finally feel comfortable enough to fantasize about the future, baby names and room layouts and all of the fun things that go along with expecting. If you follow me on pinterest, I'm sorry for flooding you with goodies... and food, lots of food. Lol. Recently I even invested in some cute maternity clothes. I feel bigger every day, and I must admit... it makes me feel beautiful, this life inside of me.

 

 

 

Something is definitely growing in there. :) As our first trimester is rapidly coming to a close, I can't help but feel like shouting from the rooftops how amazing our God is. I don't hesitate when anyone asks about our pregnancy to tell them what a miracle it is, and how amazing our God truly is. Please continue to pray for us and little clover baby, who is now the size of a large plum or a ripe apricot (depending on what app you look at). We are feeling a little better every day, a little less sick... a little less tired. Some days are still tough, but they are glorious. My darling child, I will do anything I possibly can to take care of you... even if all you want to eat is Special K (fruit and yogurt variety) and sliced bananas (clover's current favorite food). I've never been so anti-junk food before. Not because I'm trying to be healthy, but because I just do not want it, for the first time in my life. All in all, everything is going wonderfully. I praise God for that every day, please join me in singing His praises. For today, I'll leave you with this beautiful verse:

 

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

 

We hope to be able to update you soon with more good news and a gender announcement just as soon as we know!! My mom is thinking it's a girl... I'm leaning towards a boy. We have NO preference, but in every clover dream I have, baby is a bouncing beautiful boy. :) We love you all! Thank you for your love and prayers!

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National Infertility Awareness Week is approaching very soon, so be on the lookout for information about events going on around the US and where you can go to find information and support. Remember, if you are on the path of infertility... God is not doing this to punish you. You haven't done anything to deserve this. But God WILL use this to grow you. He WILL use this to take your faith beyond anything you could even imagine and He WILL use you to bring Him glory. He is in the business of miracles, and He has a plan for you. Stand confident in the love of our Father. 





The Best Days of my Life

I had a friend ask recently how I was feeling. I had to respond with pure honesty... every day this child's heart beats inside of me, is the greatest day of my life. Sure there are aches and pains, nausea, vomiting, discomfort, heartburn, breakouts and the whole laundry list of things no one warns you about.... but I praise God for every single one. Every day, is the greatest day of my life. I feel like every second of my free time is spent deep in thought, thanking God repeatedly.... and then... thanking him again.

We had our final visit with our reproductive endocrinologist today, it couldn't have gone better. Little clover baby has grown a lot in the last week, we are measuring exactly 11 weeks, which I will be on Friday. Here he/she is: first picture was taken last week, the second was taken today.

 

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart. Jeremiah 1:5

Clover baby liked keeping his/her hands in his/her face, teasing us with almost perfect pictures. We are now released to a regular OBGYN, whom I will meet with next week. Also, no more hormone treatments!! The placenta is now formed and taking over, looking healthy and beautiful. I'm already showing. Sure the normal person wouldn't really be able to tell for sure whether I was pregnant or just really bloated, but the people who see me every day can definitely see a difference. It's so exciting. I ordered my first maternity wear, I can still squeeze into my regular clothes but they're super uncomfortable. This picture was taken last week, I feel like every day I get a little bigger. It's awesome!

I just can't get over this feeling of joy and love.... my cup runneth over. Blessings abound... I am in constant awe over the power of our Lord. Just the thought brings me to tears.

Rejoice dear friends... God is alive and working in our lives. He can turn any situation into a beautiful love story, as long as He remains the main character. Keep the Lord first always. Thank Him for everything, even the hard times... they make you appreciate the blessings even more.

Thank you for your continued prayer, please keep them coming! We love each and every one of you!

For those of you still struggling, the fear still remains, but every day it is more and more muted. Pray for peace. Pray for patience. Thank God for standing by you and holding you up through every day. Your story may take a turn at any moment! Be ready to be flooded with blessings, for that is what our Lord wants for us! He also wants the GLORY! And BOY does he deserve it!!! To God alone be the glory!! Praising Jesus continually!! Keep the faith!

Clover baby is due October 17, 2014.

Enough of the Hurt.. Let's Talk About The Healer

1 John 5: 14-15 And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.

This last week or so has been trying. I have spent SO many hours in prayer, praying for healing of our hematoma... for our little one to be okay and to grow since the growth was behind at our first official appointment. I've sang the song "The Hurt and the Healer" by mercy me about a thousand times, sometimes just in my head.

 

So here I am

What's left of me

Where Glory meets my suffering...

 

I fall into your arms open wide

When the hurt and the Healer collide

 

Just keep my  eyes completely fixed on You

Lord take hold and pull me through!

 

 

So here we are, 8 weeks and 6 days pregnant... already feeling so blessed because this is more pregnant than we ever made it to previously... Stomach already expanding due to my very small frame : ) I thought it would take me longer to get a little "bump"... nope, it's here... happily the biggest my stomach has ever been, I can't wait to see it even bigger!

 

I still have had no spotting whatsoever. This is what I've been most afraid of this past week, that the bleeding would start... and then not stop. Thankfully, that was not the case.

 

Our doctor's appointment today could not have gone any better. Before we saw the doctor we had our ultrasound... and there wiggling on the screen was a perfect little gummy-bear shaped baby. Measuring nearly normal now at 8 weeks and 3 days. That's a lot of growth in barely over a week. Exactly what we were praying to see. What's even more amazing? My subchorionic hemorrhage is nearly gone. It's tiny now, which means my body has just absorbed it... and I didn't have to pass any of the blood : ) It's still possible to have spotting now with a small bleed but not as likely. Baby's heart rate was 173... must have been all the hot sauce I ate at lunch. There our baby was... wiggling away, looking very happy and at home... shaking those little tiny arms and legs.

 

After the ultrasound we met with our RE one more time. He was thrilled with our progress... he said "man that baby is really catching up!!" to which we responded, "yeah we gave it a really stern talking to about picking up the pace." ; ) We looked so good in fact that he is cutting my esterase (estriadol) dosage in half to only once a day. We will continue the Crinone (progesterone) and the single dose of esterase for about two weeks or so... until the placenta fully takes over. He wants us to come in one more time in two weeks for another ultrasound, just to be sure we are 100%, but he already told me to make an appointment with our regular OBGYN for 2-4 weeks from now.

 

Other than a string of splitting headaches and a lot of nausea, I feel fantastic. So incredibly happy... so incredibly blessed. Healing is so amazing... physically and emotionally. I still miss my other babies, but it feels so amazing to be pregnant. I cannot thank all of you enough for your support and prayers. We are overjoyed. Please pray things continue this way!

How glorious our Healer is. All praise to the Lord!!

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Dear Little Butterbean,

Mommy and daddy are beside ourselves with joy after such good news today. Boy how you have grown so fast!! We are so proud! Thank you so much for holding tight to me! God is so good, I cannot wait to tell you to your face how much of a miracle you are. I promise to do the best I can carrying you... it is my greatest honor. Seeing you wiggling for us on that ultrasound screen made us giggle and almost cry, though I managed to keep it together in front of the doctor. He gave us the biggest hugs before we left, I hope one day you get to meet him, he really is an excellent doctor. Mommy and daddy have had a lot of fun joking with him. He wants to see you again in two weeks and then you will see mommy's regular doctor... so keep doing well... keep growing!! Keep holding on!! We completely adore you my love! You will never know how grateful mommy is for you... I thank God for you every minute of every day... and I will for the rest of my life.

With all the love in the World,
Mommy and Daddy

When God fights your battles...

You always win, in the end.

I know most of you have already seen the news on facebook. My overzealous husband had posted the picture before I was even done scanning.

so.... ladies and gentlemen... here THEY are...

 

 

Two little sacs... two little heartbeats... 124 beats per minute (measuring 6 weeks and 1 day) and 116 beats per minute (measuring 6 weeks). One of them is a little harder to see right now because of where the baby is sitting in the sac but we still got the heartbeat... I'm praying for BOTH of their growth and continued health. Today I am 6 weeks and 5 days pregnant, I am happy with their measurements, I know when someone else is scanning me they will be much more accurate!!

 

I still can't stop crying. In a good way. : )

 

Vacation was good, but honestly I've never been so glad to be home. I'm beyond tired... and a trip just wiped me out!

 

I like to say when you cry out to God he always shows up... but sometimes he likes to show off too... what an amazing God we serve.

 

Our doctor's appointment is Monday and if all is well he will set us up to be released to the care of an obgyn... possibly high risk with multiples. : )

 

Please lift these babies up in your prayers!! And join us in praising and thanking God for this miraculous creation!! 

To God Alone Be The Glory

4th of July 2013. What a day for celebration.... while thinking about all those throughout the nation honoring this day, we will be celebrating a little differently this year. We are spending the day giving all glory and honor and praise to our Lord above. When you pour into him... He definitely pours right back out to you... and in His perfect timing, He will answer your prayer. For two years we have prayed... for two years we have struggled... for two years we have been tested and fought back against forces that tried to drag us down physically and emotionally.

Well my friends... I know you are all anxiously awaiting our news...


Our numbers are good! We are officially expecting!!

Don't mind him... I'm pretty sure he's still in shock.

Okay... okay... you caught me... we did a home test first. Patience is not one of my strong virtues... but we are working on that. : )

While we are overjoyed for this... we must stop and thank the One who brought us here... the One that created this life (or lives) within my womb. It is only by God's provision and blessing that we have arrived to this point in our lives.

You see... it doesn't matter how many medications I took... what doctor's I saw... this is all God's work. God gives these doctors the knowledge to help those who struggle... God is the creator of all life. Not an embryologist... not a reproductive specialist... Only God can create life. And ... He has.

It will be several weeks before we know whether we are expecting one baby or two... but honestly we are hoping and praying for two. We fell in love with those little babies as soon as we saw their picture, of course we want them both! We will be happy with whatever God sees fit to give us. This blessing is beyond anything we deserve... this beautiful life is beyond anything we deserve. We cannot thank God enough for all He has done for us and in us over these last two years.

The first trimester is a little scary for us, considering what happened with our first angel baby... but we must put fear aside. We already love these babies so much, they definitely have all of our hearts. Please pray for us during this time... that these babies grow and stick around for a while. : ) But no matter what happens... I will enjoy every second of this pregnancy... even when I have my head in the toilet and my boobs hurt so bad that they wake me up when I move around at night. I thank God for each and every symptom that lets me know our little babies (or baby) are holding tight in there. Our numbers will be rechecked on Saturday to ensure that they are going up... right now my beta HCG is 115, which the nurse said is STRONG positive. They should double every 48-72 hours.

Many people have asked if we whether or not we would announce this pregnancy so early considering our first miscarriage, but I believe this is a huge show of faith for us to step out and make it public. There are so many people rooting for us... praying for us... and we cherish each and every prayer we receive.

Hebrews 4:16
So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.

Matthew 7:7
Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.

So friends... as you are celebrating the holiday with your friends and family today, we ask that you say a special prayer of thanks... every prayer gets answered... every prayer matters. 

I heard a song called "One Drop" by Plumb... it perfectly describes how I'm feeling right now... happy... blessed... amazing.

I need you and you need me
Left alone we will never be who we could be
So take my hand and don't forget
We can do anything together!

Oh, oh, oh,
Just one drop of your love
A single ray of sun
Just one thing to change the world!
It's just you and me starting with a dream
And giving all you've got
Only takes one drop!
Oh, oh, oh, only takes one drop!
Only takes one drop
Only takes one drop
Oh, oh, oh, oh

Come with me now, look and see how
There's an ocean overflowing with our hopes!
So let's jump in and take a swim
You and me yeah, forever!

Oh, oh, oh,
Just one drop of your love
A single ray of sun
 Just one thing to change the world!
It's just you and me starting with a dream
And giving all you've got
Only takes one drop!
Oh, oh, oh, only takes one drop!
Only takes one drop
Only takes one drop
Oh, oh, oh, oh

I need you and you need me
We can do anything together!

 

 

One drop of hope... of love... of faith can change your world or someone else's. It sure has changed mine. Jump in... face your fears... and above all... have faith my friends. God is real and alive and working in you every day!

 

Deuteronomy 31:6

So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you."

1 Corinthians 16:13
Be on guard. Stand firm in the faith. Be courageous. Be strong.

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Dear Babies,

I promise to take the best care of you that I possibly can. Hold tight little ones... and even if all you continue to let me eat is chicken lo mein and golden honeydew melon and watermelon jolly ranchers, I promise to never complain... I will give you anything your little forming hearts desire... just try to give me a heads up to the things you hate before they go into my mouth ; ) I will gladly avoid anything you don't like. I don't have enough words to tell you how much your daddy and I love you... but that doesn't even hold a candle to how much God loves you. We are so thankful to Him for creating you and giving you to us. Your grandparents are beside themselves with joy... and your Aunt Annie cried almost as much as mommy did at the happy news. Your uncle Derek will protect you forever and your little cousin Ethan cannot wait to play with you and teach you all the little tricks he has learned to get your way. I think your great-mammaw is more excited than anyone (except us, of course)... you have such a big family that has been wanting you in their lives so badly! There are so many more people that love you so much already... we cannot wait for you to meet all of the prayer warriors that have been constantly in prayer for you to come to be.

Grow strong my darlings. I promise to keep you safe in every way I possibly can... but only by the grace of God can mommy do that... and mommy and daddy are praying for you constantly!

Your daddy found this song and I promised him that I would learn it and sing it to you every single night before bed...

Love,
Your very very very happy Mommy and Daddy... and three puppies that are guarding mommy's tummy every day : )